GOD MAKES EVERYTHING BEAUTIFUL IN HIS OWN TIME
As I sat in the school auditorium with other graduate on Wednesday May 15, 2019 during our convocation service, I began to reflect about my journey before I gained admission to study banking and finance in LASU.
In 2014, it was one of my Mum’s customer that paid for my Jamb form when mum was still running a wholesale and retail provision store before life happened.
I had 219 in Jamb that year after I had failed in the previous year. My school of choice was Obafemi Awolowo University. I read with all my strength that year while I was working as a sales attendant with my boss that sells biscuit in Ikotun market. The daytime were meant for work while I rest for few hours when I get home. The midnight was meant for study. No post Jamb tutorial whatsoever during those periods. It was telling on my health but I kept my eye on the goal and never relented on gaining admission that year even when the question ringing on my heart was how the bills will be footed. My sister was in the university at that time. My mum was sick almost to the point of death. We lost our accommodation. All thanks to my Pastor who accommodated I and my younger sister at church mission house.
These are stories I’m not proud to tell. Like my favourite gospel musician Sola Allyson will say, “The past should just remain in the past and the door should be closed forever”. But I’ve discovered that my mess or messes are my message to the world.” Who knows if this will change the mind of that young guy or girl contemplating suicide at this moment.
I went to Ife to write the Post ume with a little bit of fear and trepidation but I still tried to encouraged myself in the Lord. A family friend of ours accommodated me in the staff quarters. I remember vividly that I wrote the post ume on Saturday August 2, 2014. I did the best I could do in the exam. But I didn’t really do the maths well. I was fearful of what the outcome will be like but I still trusted God.
Result came out on Monday August 4, 2014 and we need to purchase a scratch card to check it. All I had on me was the transport fare to take me back to Lagos. My plan was to come back to Lagos and work for the month of August to raise money to pay for the card so I can later check it. However, our family friend I stayed with surprised me with their kind gesture. They paid for the scratch card and I was able to check my result. As I went to Hezekiah library to check my result that Monday, my heart was racing and pounding at the same time. The result page was finally displayed and I had 199. OAU cut off mark for accounting that year was 200. Just 1 mark. I shook my head and the tears came rushing down.
I am a FAILURE again. I had so much questions to ask God. Why me? Why can’t you even compensate me with a success in this exam considering the kind of stress I went through while I was preparing for the exam? Why must I have to cope with lack, suffering, deprivation and academic failure at the same time? I was among the best in all the schools I went to in secondary school. Why should I experience difficulty securing admission when those I felt were not as bright as I am have gained admission? Even if I had to fail, I should fail in a very useless way. Like having 160 or 170. Why must I fail with just one mark? Am I a bad Christian?
Apparently, the more I bombarded God with a lot of questions, the more he became SILENT. He only answered my questions with the event of Wednesday. He only made me realised that everyone has their clock and that if they got there before me, I should not fear. He only wants them to witness my arrival.
I picked my bag and literally cried from Ife to Lagos. What even made me cry more was a guy that sat beside me in the bus. His phone ranged and he picked it up. From the conversation, I could decode that his father was the one calling him. I could also decode that the man was asking him what he scored from the other end when the guy said he had 344 and he even said he expected to do better than that. Ha! Aye mi! What kind of a person is this one. When I just need 1 mark to make the cut off mark. Everyone just knew I was sobbing in the car and every attempt to get me to talk about what the problem was ended up in futility.
I returned to Lagos and gave up on admission that year. The following year is another opportunity to try again. I returned to my sales attendant job. On Wednesday August 6, 2014, one of my Big brother in church who was studying at LASU at that time called me to tell me that LASU was selling Post Ume form and student that did not pick LASU can still apply. The jamb cut off mark was 180 that year.
I dropped the call and the question that came to my mind is where will I even get the money to buy the form. I approached my boss for a salary advance. Considering the amount I was been paid then, if she gives me that salary, the remaining money she’ll balance me in August ending will be so small. Let me approach her first. I summoned the courage to tell her about it. She gave me the money and on Thursday August 7, 2014, I hooked up with my Big Brother at a café in Ikotun to purchase the form online. One of my concern that year again was the high fee that was been paid by Lasuite that year. But on getting home that day from work, Lagos Television news carried it that the school fees has been reduced due to a protest led by the student union government. I also heard it was a political strategy for APC not to lose Lagos state governorship position to PDP in the next election which will hold in 2015 as one of the campaign manifesto of PDP was to give lagosians affordable education.
On Saturday August 9, 2014, I went to LASU to write the post ume. I didn’t read for it. I was like, the one I read for OAU, where did it take me to? I only had general inherent knowledge about some things. I wrote the Post ume and had 59. It was the third highest grade after a girl who had 64 and another girl who had 61. I was optimistic about gaining admission that year. The month of August came to an end and Alhaja Badru Ola Sherryfah still gave me my full salary. Thank you ma for the show of love. May God continue to bless you richly.
First list of admission came out, my name was not on the list. Second list, same thing. I was vexed in my spirit as I saw student with a score as low as 40 plus mark range being on the list. Finally, the third list came out and my name was on the list.
My God is a Miracle worker. I was amazed at the way he wrote a failure turn success script within the space of 7 days. This was a person that failed OAU post ume on August 2 but later went on to excel in LASU post ume.
That was how the LASU journey started. I remember vividly that none of my family or loved ones were around to celebrate with me on my matriculation day due to different reasons except my Pastor. I couldn’t pay for the matric gown and I was too shy to even ask people to borrow me gown to snap picture. My pastor had told me not to forget the son of who I am and take over the Land of LASU. And Yes I did that with the help of God.
The journey was not a smooth one but God was faithful to keep me under the shadow of his wings. For this, I will forever be grateful to GOD.
To everyone who supported me on this journey, I’m grateful 🙏
Your prayers lifted me.
Your financial support ensured that I didn’t end up as a drop out.
Your material support went a long way.
Your encouragement ensured that I didn’t throw in the towel.
Your word of advice and counsel ensured I borrowed myself brain when I want to do stupid things.
At this point in my life, if I should write a book on HELPERS OF DESTINY, using my life as a case study, it will definitely be a BEST SELLER book.
Maami, you are a mother every child should desire to have. May you live long to eat the fruit of your labour in good health. My siblings, you girls are wonderful people.
My family, friends and loved ones, you all are one of the gift I’m grateful to God to have in my life. I pray that I won’t disappoint you.
I don’t know what the future holds presently but I’ll let the God that makes things beautiful in his own time hold my hands and follow him every step of the way. I’ll keep him in the driver’s seat of my life. I’ll allow him to write a perfect script for my life. If he has brought me this far, I’m sure he will not leave me now.
Whatever storm you are passing through presently, invite the God who can calm every storm into the boat of your life and be sure that your boat will not capsize. Quit that suicidal thought. Keep hanging on. You are the next in line for a miracle. I celebrate your victory in advance.
I call you blessed!
SW&SH is a weekly series here on Procyon News. Join me.
I’m done, I’m gone, I’m ghost!