By Reno Omokri
First published in my column in Sunday ThisDay of February 3, 2019.
One of the most shameful spectacles ever to have happened in the history of Nigeria occurred on Thursday, January 31st of 2019 when President Muhammadu Buhari gleefully and with much aplomb, raised up the hand of the Governor of Kano, Umar Ganduje, and urged the crowd at the Sani Abacha stadium to vote for the Governor for a second term.
In case you have forgotten, this is the same man who was caught red handed on camera receiving bribes. He has been nicknamed Gandollar because of that and I christened him the father of babanriga mobile banking.
This man, this thief, this rogue, is who President Buhari endorsed. Imagine that. It was fitting that the endorsement of Ganduje by President Buhari was done at the Sani Abacha stadium in Kano. What better venue for the show of shame than a monument to Nigeria’s biggest ever thief!
And President Buhari’s conscience is obviously convicting him, because shortly after the dishonourable endorsement, Garba Shehu, the Any Government in Power political prostitute, released a statement explaining that President Buhari was powerless to prosecute Ganduje because of his immunity.
First of all, this is not true. Udom Emmanuel, the Akwa-Ibom Governor, also has immunity like Governor Umar Ganduje, yet the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission filed fraud charges against the Akwa Ibom governor on December 18, 2018. So Buhari’s excuse that he cannot do anything to Ganduje because of his immunity is just that-an excuse.
But even if it were true, does the Constitution also compels him to associate with known criminals? By endorsing Governor Ganduje, President Buhari has become guilty of his crimes and is at best an accessory after the fact. How can a President associate with known crooks and still brandish his anti-corruption image?
President Buhari’s desperation for a second term has caused him to abandon even his pretense of fighting corruption. He has canonized Orji Kalu, the alleged eja nla thief as a saint. The man was declared wanted by the EFCC only to turn up at President Buhari’s right hand during his rally in Abia. How could the EFCC have missed him? The man was at that stadium for two hours. A wanted man.
The hypocrisy even got to suffocating levels when Senator Abdullahi Adamu, who was enmeshed in an EFCC multi million Naira fraud and whose son, not to be outdone, is under trial for a multi-billion Naira fraud, joined President Buhari on stage as he campaigned in Minna and praised the President’s anti-corruption war.
It does not occur to him that if the President was truly fighting corruption, he and his son would be in a really nasty guest house belonging to the federal government.
What is worse, Senator Adamu is the North Central Presidential Director for the Buhari-Osinbajo campaign organisation. I could not make up such nonsense even if I tried. How can a man who was fingered in a multi-billion Naira corruption case be your coordinator? What am I even saying? Isn’t Akpabio also his coordinator?
At this stage, only a simpleton would still believe in Buhari’s alleged integrity. His integrity, if he ever had any, died with the late Major General Tunde Idiagbon (rtd) of blessed memory.
Even his wife, Aisha Buhari, seems unable to bear the stench of her husband’s hypocrisy. Have you seen her in recent days on the campaign trail? I admire Aisha. I suspect she does not want to share the stage with the likes of Gandollar, Akpabio and Orji.
Buhari’s moral depravity and his unfitness for power are now all too clear. Consider the following for example:
- SACKS Onnoghen. BACKS Ganduje.
- Abacha DID NOT steal. PDP Stole
- Kemi Adeosun escorted to airport. Adeleke escorted to court
- Obanikoro: A thief when in PDP. A saint after he decamped to APC
The saddest fact of all in this saga is the fact that President Buhari is not even ashamed. He is so brazen and in your face about his hypocrisy because he feels that he has a captive audience in the North that will vote for him no matter the situation.
He is also counting on Tinubu’s desperation to be President after him to ensure that he gets the Yoruba vote. Whether his gambit works, I do not know. But what I know is this, the name Buhari will go down in history as a byword for hypocrisy and disappointment, the likes of which Nigeria has never seen before and may never see again.
As to the EFCC, I quote the last words of Brigadier Mamman Vatsa ‘as to the Nigerian Army, let me warn you that the minute you start insulting yourself, you will never lack those willing to help you insult yourself’. In endorsing Ganduje, Buhari has insulted you and you have clapped for him.
Exams are a test of memory, not a test of intelligence. Don’t feel you are unintelligent because you failed an exam or you did not get a First Class. It is better to fail at school but win in life than to pass at school and fail at life. Those who know the right things will rule over those who know many things. University professors know a lot of things but many of them are poor. You can pass exams, but if you don’t know how to solve people’s problems, you will never be rich #RenosNuggets